Good Morning my peoples,
How are you? Feelin good? Feelin fresh? I hope so :)
Do you have sabotage syndrome? I'm not certain that is an actual syndrome but have you ever thought that maybe things don't happen how you originally wanted them to or thought they would because you were in your own way?
Do you sometimes blame others or think they're the problem or at fault but that's because you automatically are on defense all the time and never felt safe enough to consider that it could be you creating the issue or making something out of nothing or stopping something before it starts?
We rarely look at ourselves and how we may have contributed to something ending or not gone our way. We can rarely see where we could have been different. We are almost never aware that our traumas and experiences have programmed these patterns we live by and therefore can almost never see that we have the ability to and often do, sabotage our own success.
Here is another example, sometimes we leave people because subconsciously or even consciously we believe they will leave us anyway, so we do it first. It is easier that way right? What is really going on though is somewhere along the lines and at some point in our life, probably childhood, we felt abandoned. Someone left. Or maybe they didn't leave but were never really there. Or maybe we witnessed others in and out of our parent or parents lives that we learnt someone always leaves.
I have been told a few times form my spiritual gurus that I have exactly that. That I am tough and strong and independent with a fear of abandonment which I laughed at when I first heard it because the experiences that I can recall, I am the leaver ALWAYS. I thought I was strong and not a push over because I was like that but in fact I now believe there may be truth what I have been told, that I kick people to the curb and don't look back because I believe they will just leave one day. I mean, lots of people don't deserve to be in my life and I will not keep those who have wronged me HOWEVER the core of that ' abandonment ' belief, holds some truth I think. It just rests in my subconscious. Make sense? When I feel disappointed in someone or exhausted at trying I bounce. If I try, it is not for long. I have this ' shape up or ship out ' mentality.
As for sabotage, it's the same thing. Sometimes people mess up just because they can't be vulnerable enough to share their truth. Or they make up things in their mind to not move forward with something because of the fear it is not the right thing, therefore sabotaging it.
Ask yourself, is that you? If it is, why? Why do your insecurities get the best of you? What secrets are you afraid to share? Why do you think you aren't good enough? And then ask yourself " Why kill something by your own hand before you even started when you have no idea what the outcome will be ? "
Food For thought;
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